By Silvia Solis
Guest Writer for Wake Up World
What would your relationship be like if you treated your partner every day as if it were Valentine’s Day?
It’s the morning of February 14th, you wake up early and very excited because today is special. As you prepare to go to work, adrenaline is pumping through your entire body. Just knowing that you will have a romantic dinner with your partner in a fancy restaurant is more than enough to fill you with extra energy to accomplish everything you have to do today. So you style your hair, put on makeup, wear a special dress, and put on those stilettos that truly bring out the beauty in your legs.
At work, your colleague suddenly brings you a dozen red long-stemmed roses. Jealousy fills the office as all eyes are on you while you read the note that says: “You’re the most amazing woman on this planet, and I love you with all my heart and soul.”
Your heart beats so strongly that your hands shake as you fumble to text him immediately.
“Thank you so much for the flowers, honey. You are the best! I love you and I can barely wait to spend the evening with you!”
The moment of truth finally arrives. Your guy meets you in front of the parking lot of the restaurant, opens the car door, and lands a kiss so passionate on your lips that your body instantly heats up. He is also dressed to impress — he looks so dashingly handsome that you can’t take your admiring eyes of him.
He grabs your hand and leads you into the restaurant. He opens the door for you, allows you to enter first, and wastes no time taking your hand again. The Maitre d’ asks you to wait as he checks to see if your table is ready, leaving your man to sneak in yet another passionate kiss.
Dinner is fabulous, but the conversation steals the night. Well, you do most of the talking as he listens attentively and caresses your arm tenderly. You pour out all your thoughts, feelings, fears, failures and triumphs. Oddly enough, despite sharing so many emotional stories, you can’t remember ever laughing so much.
As you carry on and on, you realize how sexy and beautiful he makes you feel just by looking at you. You let him know just how much you love and appreciate him, and how lucky you feel for having him in your life.
Hours spent at the restaurant fly by as if they were only minutes. When the waiter asks if you would like to see the dessert menu, both of you smile at each other shyly and, as if you have read each others thoughts, you quickly decline. Dessert was waiting for you at home. Alone!
The next morning, Valentine’s Day is over and life continues on its normal course.
Time passes so quickly. Days spin into weeks. Weeks breeze into months.
Although the bond between you and your partner is still strong, you have noticed that all your responsibilities and daily routines have taken a slight toll on your relationship. Sometimes you just can’t shake the feeling that something is different between the two of you. The uplifting little details, once so important in your relationship, have taken a back seat to the daily grind of life and routine.
When you finally have time to spend alone with each other, both of you are so exhausted that all you want to do is eat, watch TV and go to bed. The once ever-so-passionate kisses are now a single peck on the lips followed by “Good night, love. Sleep well.”
Relationships Are Not Guaranteed
Most relationships, unfortunately, start to fade with time. Partners stop making each other their top priority, and the little acts of tenderness seem to diminish daily.
But relationships can stand the test of time. The “secret” to keeping your partnership strong and healthy is to treat each day as if it were your anniversary or Valentine’s Day.
Can you imagine what would happen if you made your relationship top priority? What shape would it be in if you both paid attention to all the small details every day?
The fact that you share a good relationship today is no guarantee that it will be solid in the future; not even if both of you have sworn eternal love for each other. No relationship is guaranteed; not even if you are married with children.
Keeping Your Relationship Healthy
Think of your relationship as if it were a beautiful garden full of colorful flowers, well-trimmed bushes, and bountiful fruit trees. All the time and effort you spent on your garden – planting, watering, removing weeds – have definitely paid off.
But your beautiful garden needs constant care. If you stop paying attention to all the little things it needs daily, the weeds will grow and take it over. After that, it won’t be long before your plants dry up, your bushes get out of control and your trees stop bearing fruit.
The good news is that you can avoid this.
If you want your partnership to flourish over time, treat each other as if every day was Valentine’s Day. Here are a few ideas that you can do daily:
- Fix yourself up; get sexy for your partner.
- Send him loving emails and text messages to let him know that you are thinking about him.
- Tell him just how much you appreciate all that he does for you.
- Be his buddy; have fun!
- Plan a romantic date for only the two of you at least once a week.
Be sure that you’re doing what he actually wants (not what you think he wants), and also, tell him what you like/want! Unfortunately, one of the main reasons most women feel frustrated in their relationships is because they mistakenly think: “If he loved me, he’d know what I like/want.” But, how can he guess what’s on your mind? It’s your job to tell him. If you don’t, you will most likely become dissatisfied because you are not getting your needs met.
Get the Ball Rolling
As you read this article, are you thinking: “I love the idea of paying more attention to the daily details in my relationship, but what if he doesn’t do the same for me?” Don’t worry about that for now. It only takes one partner to help make your relationships more fulfilling. Your relationship can become stronger even if only one of you makes an effort to do more for the other one. Just start treating him well and share the ideas in this article with him. Tell him that you would really appreciate it if he did more of the things that you love … as if every day was Valentine’s Day.
Remember, the small details that you do – or don’t do – will greatly impact the quality of your relationship. So get busy doing something nice for your partner – and express yourself!
About the author:
Silvia Solis is a Martha Beck Certified Life and Relationship Coach. Silvia helps women heal from heartbreaks, become healthy, balance their emotions, create the relationships they’ve always wanted, and enjoy fulfilling lives. She also helps professional women who are burned out to stop feeling overworked and overwhelmed, and create sustainable balance between their careers and their personal lives.
Find out more at www.silviasolis.com