By Juliet Tang
Contributing writer for Wake Up World
The Disempowered Empath
For years, I identified myself as an empath.
As a child, I grew accustomed to always anticipate and sense the energy around my moody dad who loved me very much, but was not conscious of managing his emotions. It felt like the natural thing for me at the time to learn as quickly as I could how to work with the energy in my environment, as well as to do whatever I could to please others so they could feel better and less grumpy.
Needless to say, I spent the majority of my life alternating between feeling emotionally responsible for others, dodging energy and negative emotions, people pleasing and seeking approval, or being flat out drained.
Riding the subway, going to crowded places, or even hanging out on a Saturday night with friends at times felt like a chore. I feared I’d take on others’ energy if I wasn’t careful. As a result, I practiced a ton of grounding and energy cleansing techniques in an attempt to protect my energy.
I’m not going to say that the techniques didn’t help, but for a long time, I missed the crucial component – for as long as I held onto the unconscious belief that something outside of me was responsible for my energy, I was forever trapped in a loop where I gave away my energy, aka. power.
My spiritual awakening years ago allowed me to realize just how much energy I leaked in playing the victim, the healer, the selfless helper, the compassionate listener, the empathic being, etc. I was simply exhausted! In the end, the journey guided me back to the cause of it all – myself.
All the tips on energy management including raising vibration, spending quiet time in nature, energy healing, visualizing an energy bubble outside of the self, and recharging your battery are valid, some may be more effective for you depending on individual differences and preferences.
However, until you empower yourself, you will always be addressing the symptoms rather than the cause of why your energy is constantly being drained. Below, I’m sharing three tips for you to reclaim your power.
3 Tips on Energy Management and Empowerment for Empaths
Know How You Truly Take on Others’ Energy
You can certainly take on others’ energy, but it doesn’t happen the way many think it does.
The myths around energy vampires, attacks as well as the caution we feel when we are around certain people creates a ton of fear, and such fear has generated perpetuating beliefs that for people who are sensitive to energy, if they aren’t shielding their energy, they are at risk.
It is true that any form, whether visible such as living organisms and objects, or invisible in the likes of emotions, thoughts and ideas is a manifestation of energy. Energy cannot be created or destroyed, it can only change form. This means, everything that has ever been thought of, felt and experienced by anyone since the beginning of time is lingering somewhere in the collective field of our existence.
Those energies “floating” out there do not have your nametag on them for them to track you down and latch themselves onto you just because you are an empath. In order to attract a certain energy into your energy field, you must first become a matching frequency to that energy either consciously, or unconsciously. From having worked with many empaths, I’d say 99% of it is unconscious.
It ultimately means, when you feel you’ve taken on a certain energy from others or the environment, there must first be a matching, or similar vibration within you that has called it in. It can be a belief, a pattern, a fear, an emotion, a judgment, a thought, or anything generated by you either on the conscious or unconscious level. It works for both higher and lower frequency energies (higher and lower do not mean good or bad) that you come in contact with.
This is the hard truth that I was not aware of for many years, and while I worked endlessly to make sure my space was energetically clean, and I was always wearing crystals and plus an energy bubble, I neglected working on myself to shift the cause.
Own Your Empowerment
It may be temporarily comforting to blame external factors for why you are feeling annoyed or exhausted. But if you are not conscious of what has caused the energy leakage, and continue to shift responsibility, you are unknowingly playing the victim game which greatly reduces your vibration to make you susceptible to energies on a similar frequency.
Have you ever had the experience in life when one thing didn’t go your way, before you knew it, one negative thought led to another and ultimately shit just hit the fan within a short period of time?
What really happened was the energy of the first disempowering thought you had quickly became a magnet to the second, the third, and any thought you’ve ever had on a similar frequency, as well as those energies “floating” in the collective field that are matches.
This is what happens when you see yourself as a victim to “energies out there”, hold onto fears that you may be under attack, blame others for draining your energy, or obsess over beliefs that you are vulnerable and require extra shielding and protection. This is also what happens when you think, speak, or act from judgment, lack, fear, low self-worth, disempowerment, separation, seeking validation, people pleasing, conformity, deceit, the list goes on.
Whatever you are being, or whatever you are vibing, your unconscious mind is always on a mission to prove to you that you are right which simply means it goes out of its way to arrange life circumstances for you to see the very proof of the beliefs and thoughts you invest most of your energy into. So if you are constantly looking to protect yourself because you feel unsafe, chances are, life will throw you something you need protection from!
I want to be very clear here that owning your empowerment is not equivalent to tossing all your energy management practices out of the window, spending time around individuals that form toxic connections, or blaming yourself for having had certain experiences in the past. Self-empowerment is about self-responsibility without judgment coming from a place of love and wholeness. The more you are responsible for every aspect of who you are, the more empowered you are.
Take Your Self-Love Practice Up a Notch
Empath or no empath, we suffer because we are disempowered. And most of disempowerment comes from a lack of self-love and healthy boundaries.
This is when the practice of mind-blowing, unconditional and non-negotiable self-love comes in. In case you haven’t noticed, we live in a world where self-love is not greatly encouraged or appreciated because no one wants to be labeled “selfish.”
A while ago, I was given a hard reality-check on my self-love practice. As I was going through a rough 3-month detox, suddenly old patterns I believed I had cleared came up one by one, and forced me to notice just how much energy I spent on trying to be there for others when I didn’t even have enough energy to be here for myself.
In a state of constant fatigue caused by the detox, residual habits of being afraid to say no, wanting to people please, always being available for others when I was feeling burnt out, doubting myself over my gut feelings, and pushing myself to “get one more thing done” even when the body was asking for rest became more apparent than ever.
One day, I realized just how much I deprived myself of unconditional self-love. Rather than feeling shame and guilt which would mean more self-judgment, I just chose to let all of it go.
Whether you are an empath or not, in order to thrive and create desired outcomes, it is imperative for you to create a clear and conscious foundation with firm and healthy boundaries that is nourishing and honors who you are from the purest and most powerful self-love you can imagine.
It means you:
- Say no when you mean no, and say yes when you mean yes.
- Become mindful of what you eat, all foods have frequencies.
- Surround yourself with a tribe of nourishing, inspiring and supportive individuals.
- Let yourself off the hook when it comes to other people’s emotions, you are not responsible for how others feel or react when your words or actions come from the space of honoring your needs.
- Allow yourself to feel, and give yourself permission to be the fullest expression of who you are.
- Acknowledge your unconditional worth, and stop looking for validation outside of you. You do not need to earn anyone’s approval, and you are not put on earth to please everyone.
- Find time to rest, unplug and detox from social media, enjoy hobbies you love, and engage in activities that feel inspiring to you.
- Own your voice, speak your truth, and radiate your authenticity.
- Trust yourself and your intuition.
- Release any story, belief or pattern that brings up feelings of victimhood, or makes others responsible for your emotions and circumstances.
- Become conscious of your inner dialogue, words and choices so they are aligned with your highest truth.
- Embody and unleash your gifts, and contribute to the world without holding back.
I can go on and on, but you get the picture.
Each of us is born with our unique gifts and visions to participate in the global consciousness evolution. Along the way, life sets up the most perfect people, circumstances and invitations to inspire us to reclaim our power; more often than not, those can be the boundary pushers and troublemakers.
Often, our gifts are disguised as curses until we have the courage to take a deep and hard look at those areas in which we gave away our power, and set a fire on all the pretense and disillusionment so we can truly step into our self-mastery and leadership.
If you are currently in the process of healing, deepening your awareness, and peeling off layers of perceived limitations, and desire to awaken to your truth, wholeness and power so you can create from your highest truth and visions, I invite you to listen to my free 21-Part Complete Spiritual Awakening Guide. You can also subscribe to my YouTube Channel, as more inspirational and educational materials are added weekly to help you create your visions in life.
I am celebrating your empowerment and leadership!
Recommended articles by Juliet Tang:
- 7 Ways to Access Inner Peace Now – What Life In New York Has Taught Me
- Money and Spirituality – 5 Common Abundance Blocks, and How to Transform Them
- Awakening: 7 Steps to Ease the Labor Pain of Spiritual Rebirth
- Teachings of Ayahuasca – Creation, Death, Rebirth, and 15 Essential Life Lessons
- My Journey of Healing Autoimmune Disease – 5 Things You Can Do to Start Healing Today
- I Woke Up and the World Around Me is Still Asleep… What to Do?
- If Your Boss Is Dolores Umbridge – 4 Spiritual Tools for the Workplace
- How Psilocybin Mushrooms and Plant Medicine Can Heal Humanity and Transform Our World
- The Search for Enlightenment: 5 Crucial Lessons…and Why None of It Actually Matters
- Why You’re Struggling to Leave Your Soul-Sucking Job
About the author:
Juliet Tang is a plant medicine integration mentor and conscious leadership guide. She supports awakened entrepreneurs and soulful individuals who are seeking expert guidance in plant medicine integration as well as soul expansion to embody higher consciousness, and manifest their grandest visions in life. Her unique brilliance is evoking the playful Divinity within. Juliet takes a powerful stand for expanding consciousness, and living your highest truth.
Her 1:1 mentoring program can be found here.